Friday, August 30

25 Most Common Insults





WARNING: If you are a sensitive person, or someone who is easily offended, I advise that you skip reading this topic which is about slang and bad language.


All images in this post are courtesy of stock.xchng


Insults* aren’t a joke. They’re very serious.


*insult = an impolite expression that is intended to hurt other people






These words can hurt the feeling of a person deeper than you expect. They can also have a long-term effect in your relationships.



You had better control your use of insults. You can damage your relationship with someone if you aren’t careful.



To see an example of how insults affect people, just read:








Every language and culture in the world has their own set of insults and impolite language. People express them when they are angry.



Insults are a natural and unavoidable part of each language in the world, including your native language and English.



Even if you have no exact need to use insults in your everyday life, it would benefit you to know them. You can often hear them in movies and TV series (hopefully not in real life).





Here are 25 of the most common insults in the English language. Because they are slang, it is easy and common for some to disappear and to be replaced by new ones.



1. Asshole / Arsehole (UK) = slang for the anus; a stupid or annoying person



2. Bastard = someone whose parents are not married (old-fashioned usage); someone or something who is unpleasant, difficult, and annoying



3. Bitch


A. a woman who is rude, cruel, and unpleasant


B. a woman who acts like she has sex with many partners


C. in a relationship, a man who is weak



4. Cocksucker = “cock” is the impolite word for a man’s penis; a “cocksucker” is a mean person that you dislike



5. Cunt = a woman’s sex organs; someone who is unpleasant and annoying



6. Dick = a man’s penis; a man who is unpleasant and stupid 



7. Dipshit = “shit” means solid waste from a person’s body; a “dipshit” is a stupid or annoying person



8. Dipstick = a stupid or annoying person



9. Dumbass = the “ass” is the part of the body that you sit on; a “dumbass” means a stupid person



10. Fatass = a fat person



11. Fuckface = a stupid or annoying person



12. Fucknut = a person who is strange or irrational (a shortening of Fucking + Nutcase)



13. Fucktard = a person who is stupid or socially inept (a shortening of Fucking + Retard)



14. Jackoff / Jerkoff = a person who masturbates



15. Jerk = someone who does stupid, annoying, or unkind things



16. Motherfucker = a person or thing that is unpleasant and annoying



17. Perv / Pervert = someone whose sexual behavior is not normal



18. Prick = a man’s penis; a man who is stupid, rude, or unpleasant



19. Pussy = a woman’s sex organ; a man who is not strong, brave, or determined



20. Scum / Scumbag = a dirty layer on the surface of a liquid; someone who is very unpleasant  



21. Shithead = a person who is foolish or useless



22. Tool = a person cheated and used by another person



23. Turd = a solid piece of waste from a person’s body; an unpleasant person



24. Twat = a woman’s sex organ; someone who annoys you or makes you angry  



25. Wanker (UK) = a person who masturbates; a stupid or unpleasant person  



Again, be extra careful with insults. Keep in mind that when you use them, it's like playing with fire. 






Hope You Learned Something!

Keep on learning !










Monday, August 26

Funny Situations in English





Nowadays I’m reminded of funny stories in my life as a teacher. These stories are usually connected to English study, but sometimes they are just situations that happen when I spend time with my foreign students.



I have here 5 stories. All of them are from real experiences. I hope you enjoy them.




1. Do You Have the Key?


all images are courtesy of stock.xchng unless otherwise stated



My students and I came home from the coffee shop one afternoon. The front door was locked and my female Korean student, who was Beginner-level, wanted to open it.



She couldn’t speak in complete sentences, only words.



First she called me by my nickname. She said: “Mon… Mon…. ” and then she said: “Key…!!!!



I told her with a serious face: “Don’t call me monkey.


:-D




2. Is It Delicious?



In the dormitory of the Korean school, the cook served a Korean dish. I can’t remember what the name of the dish was.



I was sitting beside a female student, and she was very proud of her country’s cuisine*.


*cuisine = a style of cooking



She wanted to know if I liked the taste.



So she asked me:



Mon, are you delicious?



Of course I was surprised by her question. But after thinking a while, I answered:



Maybe a little salty.


:-D




3. Let’s Go Mountain Hiking!


The Hiking Team 



My Japanese students and I went mountain hiking one day. We carried our backpacks and started the tough hike.



One student, Tetsu, and I stayed at the back of the group. We were humming the theme song of the movie “Indiana Jones” because we imagined that we were in a big adventure.







After just 30 minutes, we started to feel tired. We didn’t notice it but our “Indiana Jones” humming became quieter and quieter as we felt more and more tired. Funnily enough, it didn’t enter our minds to just stop humming.



Because we were tired and slow, we got a bit left behind.  Ahead of us, there was one student whose nickname was Negi (Welsh Onion). He didn’t realize it but his backpack was open. His stuff started falling one by one on the dirt trail.



Negi actually thought that he was getting stronger and stronger with each step he took. He thought he was getting used to the rhythm of hiking or something because his bag felt lighter and lighter.



Finally, Tetsu and I saw all the fallen stuff behind Negi. We laughed so hard because he left a very clear trail of things on the mountain slope. Like the bread crumbs of Hansel and Gretel in the fairytale. The things were lying on the ground from our spot straight to Negi’s backpack, which was hanging open. 



We knew we should help him when he was picking his stuff up, but Tetsu and I couldn’t stop laughing.




4. How to Pick Up a Girl



One night, my Japanese roommate and I were peacefully watching a film on DVD in our room. Another Japanese student came inside and said:



Hey, the cute new student is in the lobby checking her class schedule. This is my chance to have a conversation with her. Wish me luck!



My roommate and I wished him luck and continued watching the film. After about half an hour, our friend came back into the room. To our surprise, he was wearing completely different clothes!



We asked him what happened. This is the story he told us:



He went out of our room to talk to the new student. But when he arrived at the lobby, she wasn’t there anymore. He decided to just get a cup of water.

 
This photo by Andrevruas is available at <a ref="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Bebedoro.JPG">under a <a href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/ph/"> Creative Commons Attribution License 3.0



Our water cooler at that time had a problem and it was leaking. So there was a pool of water on the floor surrounding it. Worse, the lights had been turned off so it was very dim in the dining room and nobody could see anything there.



As you might have guessed, our Japanese friend slipped as he was getting water. According to him, it was lucky that nobody saw the scene because he looked really funny. His feet were sliding on the pool of water but his body tried so hard not to fall. For a while, his body tried to regain balance. He moved rapidly and energetically in those few seconds. In fact, he was like a circus performer.



juggling



He said that he even juggled the plastic cup he was carrying during the high-speed performance.  And if somebody threw a few balls to him, he would have managed to catch those as well.



But finally he fell on his ass on the pool of water. His pants and shirt were completely wet. He wasn't hurt but he was really embarrassed.



This is why he had to put on a fresh change of clothes before he came back to our room.



My roommate and I were shaking our heads at his story. We were laughing but we also felt sorry for his bad luck with girls.




5. Yes, I’m Okay



In our school, guys liked to tease each other by saying “That’s gay” or “You’re gay.”



One day, my Japanese friend had a small accident while going down the stairs. I asked him:



Are you Ok?



To my surprise, he answered:



No, I’m not gay!


:-D





Hope You Learned Something!
Keep on learning !










Thursday, August 22

The Meaning of “What’s Up?”





The word “up” is usually used as a Preposition or as an Adverb to talk about position and movement.


Ex.

the shop up the street

jump up and down

climb up the mountain

etc.



I Smell Trouble



But sometimes, in informal conversation, “up” can have the meaning that something is happening. Especially something unusual or bad.



For example, if you see your friend being very serious and quiet, you can ask:



Is anything up?


Or,

What’s up?


These expressions have the same meaning as “What’s the matter?” or “What’s wrong?”



You can also use the Prepositionwith” to add a person.



This way:



What’s up + with + somebody ?


Ex.


He looks angry. What’s up with him?


She’s always complaining. What’s up with her this time?




How to Answer



Most of the time especially in North American English, “What’s up?” doesn’t have a negative meaning. There isn’t any problem or anything wrong.



What’s up?” can have many different meanings depending on the situation. 



1.


First, it can have the same meaning as “What’s new?” or “What is happening in your life?”


A: What’s up, Toshi? I haven’t seen you in a while.


B: Nothing much. / Not much. / Not a lot. / Today is just like yesterday... 

And you?


2.


Second, it can have the meaning of “How are you?” or “How are you feeling?”


Ex.


A: Hey, James, what’s up?


B: I’m all right. / It’s all good. / It’s good.




It’s Just a Greeting



What’s up?” isn’t a real question that needs a real answer. It’s just a common greeting that you can use to your friend. In this sense, it almost means the same as “Hi” or “Hello.”



Sometimes, it can also be used with a meaning similar to “Nice to meet you.”


Ex.


A: What’s up?

B: Hey, man.


A: Hi Liz!

B: Hey, what’s up?


Sara: Megan, this is my brother Roy.

Roy: What’s up, Megan?



Origin



What’s up?” was made popular by the cartoon character Bugs Bunny. Are you familiar with him?


Copyright Warner Brothers


As early as 1940, Bugs Bunny started using the familiar phrase: “What’s up, Doc?” In fact, many people remember him together with this expression.



A few years before "What's up? ," one popular casual greeting was "What's happening, dude?" 




Other Forms



You can also hear "What's up?" phrase in other forms.


Ex.


wassup, what up, waz up, wazzup, whassup, wuzzup, wussup, sup, wa'up, swa'up



Because of its informal style, the phrase can also be answered in many casual ways.


Ex.


Nada = nothing (from Spanish)

Nuttin’ = nothing

I’m aight. = I’m all right.

S'good. = It’s good.



Other Ways to Answer


Some people actually think the phrase "What's up?" is a bit unusual. Because of this, they reply to the greeting in a humorous way. 


Ex. 


A: What's up? 

B: The sky. / The ceiling. 



But the best way to answer it is still: 



A: What's up? 

B: Nothing much. / Not much. 





Hope You Learned Something!

Keep on learning !











Saturday, August 17

Broken English





Do you know what a “meme” is?



A “meme” is an image, video, story, or joke that is passed from one Internet user to another by e-mail, blog, and social networks like Facebook and Twitter. Sometimes they are used to promote a group, movie, etc. But most of the time their purpose is for entertainment or comedy only. In any case, memes are a very powerful medium or form of art.



The word “meme” comes from the Greek word “mimema,” which means something copied.



So many memes have appeared and disappeared. Some of them became very popular while others were just a little popular. Some stayed for a very long time, while others remained only for a few days.




Lolcat



One very powerful meme is the “lolcat.” It is an image that combines the photo of a cat and some funny words.



The word “lol” inside its name is an Internet abbreviation which means “laugh out loud” or “laughing out loud.” It is used in emails, text messages, and chats when you think something is funny.



For example,


A: OMG! I sent a sexual joke to my mother by mistake.


B: LOL! That is so stupid!



Here's one example of a lolcat meme: 






As you can see in our example, the words that come with the photo are usually strange and grammatically wrong. This is called “lolspeak” or “kitty pidgin*.



*pidgin = language that is mixed with the words or grammar of another language



“Kitty pidgin” breaks the rules of English spelling and grammar, and uses the wrong forms of Verbs.



It is a parody* of the poor grammar that’s widespread on the Internet. It is similar to baby talk.



*parody = an action that copies someone or something in a funny way



Here are other examples of ungrammatical messages on lolcat memes:



Kitty Pidgin
Standard English

U mite liek it.
You might like it.
I can has cheezburger?
Can I have a cheeseburger?
Spred the luv.
Spread the love.
You has bad tranlashun?
Do you have bad translation?
Email ur frenz.
E-mail your friends.




All Your Base…



Another very popular meme is “All your base are belong to us.”



It is a phrase that became very popular on the Internet. It was taken from the opening scene of the video game “Zero Wing(European version). The words were translated from the original Japanese and they were poor grammar.






In the early ’90s, the game became quite popular in the arcades and Sega, in Japan and Europe. And then in the late ’90s, its broken English phrase "All your base are belong to us" spread fast on the Net.



Here are other translation mistakes from the game:



Original Japanese

Broken English
Correct English
機関士:何者かによって、爆発物が仕掛けられたようです。
Mechanic: Somebody set up us the bomb.
Engineer: Somebody has planted a bomb.
通信士:メインスクリーンにビジョンが来ます。
Operator: Main screen turn on.
Radio Operator: We're getting a video on the main screen
CATS:せいぜい残り少ない命を、大切にしたまえ・・・・。
CATS: You have no chance to survive make your time.
CATS: Treasure what little time remains in your lives.
艦長:我々の未来に希望を・・・
Captain: For great justice.
Captain: ...let there be hope for our future



In Summary



Memes are a great source of amusement and humor on the Web. But at the same time, it is sad that the Internet culture is focusing a lot of attention to broken English. Because of this, many Internet users are learning wrong grammar or becoming very comfortable with it. Some people, especially non-native speakers, might even think that it’s good style to copy the way lolcats and memes express themselves.



So my dear blog-reader, please be careful. You should try to distinguish whether something on the Net is made for serious purposes or only for comedy.





Hope You Learned Something!

Keep on learning !










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